blessed with great school, great teachers..

Last week, I received a call from Rynus' form teacher, 杜老师 in his childcare center, she shared with me that Rynus was a little bit emotional recently, one minute he wanted all attention from his teacher, next minute he's rolling on the floor, refusing to get up and making a big scene if anyone "dares" to touch him. 
 
So the first, and only question his teacher asked was, "Mummy, did anyone discipline him at home, by either scolding, or even beating him?"

And here's my answer to her: 
"I am very sorry 杜老师, scolding or beating is not our way of parenting at home. I know this might make your job tougher. Many other kids might behave well in school because they are scared of reprimand. My kids might not react to that well because we do not discipline them that way at home.We reason with them and let them differentiate what is right and wrong, and when they agree with what we tell them, they will learn to behave well. Of course Rynus is still young so reasoning is never easy, it requires a lot of patience, but in school we understand teachers have to take care of other kids and might not have the time to handle him that way. But so far he has been doing very well at home and no mischievous behaviors. I will try to slowly talk to him about it.."

I said that with a deep sense of guilt because one of Renzo's teachers used to comment that no beating and scolding at home is in a way, spoiling our kids. And to certain extend, she could be right because the kids might simply have no fear of adults and insist to do things their way. But I always believe as long as we set the boundaries and be firm with our principles, it's way more effective to reason with them but of course, I cannot expect others to agree with me. And especially now Rynus is behaving differently in school but as his mummy, I don't even know what could be the cause and how to better deal with it since he's perfectly fine at home.


To my biggest surprise, 杜老师 replied: "Thank you mummy thank you! I wish all parents think this way and now I am not worried anymore. I was only concerned that maybe he was somehow being punished at home that's why he might not be in good mood. So if that had never happened, let's just monitor and give him more time, it could be just a growth sprout and he might outgrow it any time soon! And I also noticed that he responds to reasoning very well, the moment he realized he's wrong, he's very willing to correct himself but of course for now it's a little harder to let him realize it, but I will try!"

After we got off the phone, I couldn't even believe that was the conversation I had with Rynus' teacher. I felt like talking to Rynus' mummy (yes I know that's myself) who truly cares about him, observes him and understands him well. The teacher must be really passionate about her job and loves all the kids just like their parents!

I recalled what teachers shared with us couple weeks ago during the meet parents session, and looked through the presentation slides they prepared for us, I feel really blessed that my kids are in great hands of awesome teachers.

I couldn't thank them (especially the form teacher 杜老师) enough for instilling discipline but at the same time, handling little Rynus' fragile emotions so well, and always keeping us parents well informed.

P/S: Of course I brought this issue up and discussed with Daddy Chan. And we both agreed that likely the change in behavior could be a result of change of "caregiver". Well recently my mother in law has started to fetch the kids home together with our helper, as I am struggling with heavy workload and a bit of health issues. Usually it's common for kids to behave differently when their routine get changed, so that's another challenge we need to tackle.

learning to write his own name

About 2 years ago when Renzo was 3.5 years old, I wrote a post about "learning to write his own name" on his blog, sharing our excitement when Renzo started to write his name in English. We totally didn't plan about when should we teach Rynus to write, well if ever we have plans, I guess I would use Renzo as the best benchmark and start to teach Rynus when he's 3.5 years old. But to our biggest surprise, after Rynus finished writing 1 to 20 & 100, A - Z independently before bedtime this evening, I tried to encourage him to write his own name, since he knows how to write all his letters though he still needs to work on his handwriting. And he managed to do it in less than 20 minutes!!

I first wrote "Rynus" on a piece of paper and asked him to read, he recognized that's his name right away. Actually for the past few weeks, he has been sharing with us about his classmates' names by repeating often: "A is for Adele, K is for Kyler, Z is for Zander, G is for Gabriel, J is for Jovina, etc, etc..". So maybe that's why it wasn't hard for him to figure out that R-Y-N-U-S is Rynus, his name!

I then asked him to try and write the word Rynus. He continued writing for at least 10 to 15 minutes and refused to let me teach or help him. He kept saying, "no mummy, I can do it!" when I was trying to guide him by spelling the letters out. On the 3rd or 4th try, I was very certain that he could already remember how to spell his name.

In no time he could write his name nicely and he was as proud as punch when we praised him in joy.

I am not sure if he could still remember how to spell/write his name tomorrow. But I am very pleased to realize that he is willing to learn and he's extremely confident and independent. He couldn't even grip his pencil properly but he puts in great efforts to make sure he applies enough pressure to make his lines smoother. Well done and way to go  my little boy!